Tuesday 25^th September

Recently at the Republic we talked about our need for privacy, personal space, time alone.  Some of us have a greater need than others, of course, but basically, in our society, we accept that we all need space and privacy.  It is more or less a given.

But…in most societies privacy is virtually unknown.  People in the islands where we went on 2XS live in small thatched huts, all jumbled in together, generations sharing living and sleeping space as a matter of course.  Nobody is ever alone!  The odd person goes out fishing in a little canoe and is maybe alone for many hours, but that is the limit of solitariness.  The women all go off together, children in tow, to work in the steep vegetable gardens; they wash communally; they often cook outside in the laneways between the huts.

A few years ago, when all of the offspring were small, I met Jill at a lunch in Sandy Bay.  She had just been to Club Med in Malaysia with her husband and three small children.  It was all very nice and very family oriented.  But her favourite and most anticipated moment came when her husband went off in one direction to play golf and her children all chose to go to a children’s activity around the pool.  Aha!  Jill took her towel, umbrella and book off to the beach.  The beautiful quiet deserted beach.  Bliss!  Privacy, space, time alone!  After a few minutes of pure happiness she heard voices.  Three Japanese women were coming down to the beach from the resort.  Oh well, plenty of space for everyone.  Plenty of space???  The three women saw Jill and cheerily made their way towards her.  They stretched out their towels as close to hers as possible, turned on their radio and proceeded to chat, giggle, scatter sand around, and generally annoy her very much.  She was outraged and wanted to get up and storm off to the other end of the beach.  But…she knew that they were just being polite and following Japanese custom, so she just lay there outwardly smiling but inwardly fuming.